Please Donate--Oh, but we Have a Few Conditions

My life's path has had me orchestrating in the downsizing of several apartments over the last nearly a decade. The first such effort was sifting through and clearing my Father's condo in 2008, the one into which I finally moved in 2012. There have been two other sorties since that time, each of them taking months to conclude, and so, in a way, rolling and merging in terms of the expenditure of effort, both physical and emotional, one into the other. I finish one, it seems, and there is another. Oh, the task of clearing someone's apartment isn't just about that. It is first about the death, or relocation that generates the need to cull and clean, and those events consume the heart and mind of themselves, but then there is the dig through lives.  And the question?  Where is this stuff going?  Who wants it?  Who is going to want it?

Oh, if there is a will or something, some pre-planning (which many people alas still do not do) some of the treasures that have been collected over a life time, are still seen as treasures by family or friends and become happy additions to another household. They may be such treasures (also valuable in the Antiques Roadshow kind of way) that families and friends even fight over them, for years, and years, perhaps.

But then, there is the "other", the stuff of daily life. A couch that is useful, but not particularly beautiful and definitely not ever to be eyed by any collector. An old TV. Out of date purses, that will be in vogue again perhaps, but not for the next twenty years. Shoes. Blankets. Large and small they overwhelm you. But, you say to yourself, "Well, they may not be priceless, but they are useful, and in good shape, and someone in need will surely be able to use them.".

And there are many large organizations which advertise--you know them, both religious and secular--their enormous need for the things that you happen to be needing to divest yourself of on your behalf or on behalf of another.

But as in all things of modern life, the desire to help has been compromised.

Yes, there is great need out there, but, there are conditions in your being able to make a successful donation. I want to thank the lawyers out there (and I am a rather embarrassed member of that profession I must disclose) whose lawsuits have assured that someone else is always to blame for my injury for generating the need for some of these conditions.

I have a couch. I want to see that though my loved one can no longer use it, it goes to that someone in need. The couch is not torn. It was only reupholstered last year, and it has many years in it to seat a growing family, or a newly married couple whose finances are a little short. I would love to see someone make good use of it, in a sense, give the couch a new lease on life. And I will be helping too, doing some good in this too often no good world. So many people have wanted to do that, give to another.

Oh, good, the charity has a truck!  Purportedly this is for large items and many boxes they hope to receive to help their communities. And then you make the call.

"What kind of building is it?"

You say, for example, "A four unit building."

They ask, "What floor?"

You reply, "The second."

And then the question that dooms the enterprise of your giving to those in need and their taking for those in need, "Does it have an elevator?"

No, there is no elevator you must reply.

"I'm sorry.  The pickup crew can't take the items from the apartment if there is no elevator.  You'll have to bring it out to the street.  We can call you thirty minutes before they're coming."

I understand, sort of. I mean, if someone is injured on the job, there will be worker's compensation, or a civil suit ending in a settlement of three times the meds, or a dog might bite the guy coming down the stairs, or he might trip on his shoe laces. Thank you, lawyers. So, no one, even the charities, will take a chance on going into a house or apartment where there are stairs, to take those items for which there is great need. One of those enterprising junk companies will do it, for a price, but for the needy, nope, nada, can't do it.

I agreed to the terms with one group in a recent cleaning of an apartment.  Yes, I will get the material downstairs. How? I had no idea, but if I had no other option, that was what I was going to do. Call some friends and hope they didn't have jobs to go to that day. Or were willing to take off. Or be an idiot and try to do it myself (likely). And I hoped for another solution.

In the nick of time, someone told me about a church in East Los Angeles.  I knew of it, because our parish takes up collections for them. It is a large church with lots of families. And I called the director of their social services. And she, they, were willing, even it seemed happy, to take things from a second floor of a building without and elevator.

Two guys. I don't think they were delighted by the stairs. Again, I understand.  I have been up and down them repeatedly with various items in my hands, heavy, though admittedly not a couch.

I helped them with boxes.  Lots of clothes, nice clothes. (That's another tale for these pages. Try to sell clothes to these trading companies, or for that matter records--they will give you a dollar and then charge market price to a young urban dweller.)  I made just about as many trips as they did. As to the couch, a little maneuvering, the two of them, they got it down and a few other lesser size pieces of furniture. There was one item even they did not take.

Well, this time, some things are going to storage as well. The moving company is more than happy to go upstairs as they are going to get paid to do it. And I guess they are all licensed and bonded and have workers compensation in case someone falls down the stairs.

But the toll these conditions by charities might take? That those who want to give will simply not. Maybe the charities have a glut now, so it won't hurt much, for a while. But in time, the calls to ask whether they want grandma's used, but still good couch, will cease.

They can't really need grandma's couch that much, right?

As for me, I will be happy to help in downsizing or clearing out down the road, but I won't be orchestrating. Anyone planning to ask me to be in charge, don't.  Been there, done that. I will leave others to hear about the conditions and the final words, "That's just our procedure."

I really mean it.